So if someone tells me they only read Dan Brown novels, or reveals that they don't like pets, then I'm moving for the block button rather than explaining all that. It's deceptive on their part, and I'd ghost because it's something you'd avoid telling them - I wouldn't gratuitously hurt someone's feelings. But I can't help but think that if you meet up with someone you owe it to them at least to send a quick message though!Rachel: I have been known to ghost someone after I realise they can't spell or use apostrophes correctly. Then they have closure and can move on (and get back to the swiping). Much like after a few months of dating it'd be a pretty douchey move to end it with someone over Whats App, it's impolite and a bit cruel to ghost someone after you've met up in person and spent hours getting to know each other. If you have somehow been living under a rock in a cave at the bottom of the ocean and don’t in fact know what ghosting is (and no, non-single people, you have no excuse to be ignorant of this cultural phenomenon), allow me to explain: Ghosting is simply when you stop replying to someone’s messages. I sat down with James, a 31-year-old single office worker, to grill him on why he ghosts women… I do it a few times every week and I genuinely don't feel guilty about it. Rachel: So you think ghosting is the kinder option than telling someone you're no longer interested? But sometimes there might be one I actually like and then it's a bit gutting if he just stops replying. James: Dating apps turn everyone into little emperors. So pre-dating apps (at 31 I'm positively prehistoric) you'd be a lot less fussy. James: If I've had a bad experience of someone who wouldn't take 'no' for an answer, does that make it a bit more justifiable? James: I, very politely, told a white lie and said I wasn't ready to date so soon after my last relationship. Although I question the truth behind it I was glad to have some closure (and was never going to contact him again and again! But to me, the sadness comes from unrequited affection, rather than how they did it.
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I usually save the 'I don't think this is a match' for someone suggesting a second date after an unenjoyable first.I recognize that I'm the worst and it's so rude—and personally, I'd much rather have someone just be straightforward with me and tell me he just doesn't want to see me anymore, but...."Rowena, 28 "If it's only been two or three dates (I try to give everyone a second chance unless they're truly terrible), I usually just say I'm really busy and ghost.If it's been more than that, though, I'll be honest and say I don't think it's the right thing for me."Kim, 26 "When someone asks me out and I don't want to go with them, it's not that hard to make my scheduling sound so impossible that I can't ever see them! And then when they still persist, like asking for coffee or something, I tell them I don't drink coffee and that's not even a lie!I'm a huge bitch and that is why I am single."Monica, 28 "I am SPINELESS when it comes to turning down guys.
To the point where, when one guy asked me out on a second date that I was not interested in going on, I typed out a very nice 'You're great, but I don't think we're right for each other' text message to reply with and then proceeded to continually stare at it but not actually send the thing—until finally too much time passed and I had just ghosted on him by default.
The reason I give is true about 70 percent of the time; the only ones I lie to are the really nice ones where there was just no chemistry, because men never believe there was no chemistry if were attracted to you.